Feeling trapped in a bitter marriage is just torment. Especially when you are convinced that it will never change.
If this is what you are going through, I know exactly how you feel my friend.
First of all, just pray and seek God for counseling. Get help from someone who knows how to fix broken marriages and read books together. If your spouse does NOT want to cooperate in these fields, then I suggest you read the rest of my blog post.
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You see, I did everything I could to make my wife happy, and yet there was always something dreadfully wrong.
I felt that she was content with being around me or spending the rest of her life with me.
We were always fighting and it never bore any fruits of righteousness.
We bought an RV and traveled across the country thinking that we would start new somewhere else. We were wrong.
We fought a lot, which produced tension and stress for a long time.
Did we have some sweet moments? I say not enough.
When we got to the Pacific West coast, my wife had to fly back for a family emergency. We didn't end up moving out west and had virtually spent all our money. I barely had enough to drive back to the East coast.
When I was around Ohio state, I called my wife and told her that we were separating and that I was taking the RV down to my family in Massachusetts and staying there for the winter.
I heard every bad husband speech along with the well-rehearsed speeches when I arrived in NY to drop off her stuff.
We split up and I called my mother who already knew that our marriage was in trouble.
I can truly say that separating from the source of my stress has given me the freedom to refocus my thoughts on Jesus Christ rather than trying to make an unhappy person happy.
You can never make someone else truly happy. Only they can make themselves happy. You and you alone possess the power to change your thoughts and make changes in your life.
Are you married to someone who you know 10 years down the road you still won't be able to get along with them?
Here's what you need to do first:
1) Have a plan where you are going to live for a while.
Whether it's your parent's spare bedroom or a friend who has offered a place to live for a while, you need to find a place where you can go for a few months maybe longer.
2) Man up, and tell her what you are going to do.
Don't listen to the crying because you know that she only uses this to get what she wants rather than reflects on how poorly she or he has treated you.
3) Take massive action and move out!
Believe me, I know that this will hurt not only you but your wife as well.
But what is worse? Arguing to each other's face every weekend? Or collecting your thoughts and clearing your head?
Look, you can't wait for someone else to change in order for you to be happy. You've got to make the call. YOU'VE got to make the decision.